Redress of Grievances

Everyone has their own moment of failure. Last night was mine. Though I tried my very best to create an extensive and well-researched report, it was still not enough. I can't totally blame our professor, it's just that the question she gave me was astoundingly difficult. It can to a point that I lost my basic law school  candor such as not speaking on a first person basis and always having a firm grasp on a choice. She owned me big time. The term reckoning point which she said was resonating in my head over and over again.

It's sad to think that a well prepared effort was put into waste. Yet again, such event is terrifyingly common in our school. Reading drastic cases, memorizing loads of terms and having sleepless nights just to find out that you fail on the following day. Those occurrences are too ordinary. However, due to my inescapable human capacity, I still can't help it to feel bad.

I've realized from own experience that there should be no self-pity. Of course, that's obvious. And the latter connotation would be to learn from your mistakes. What does not kill you makes you stronger. Such are typecast beliefs. But no matter how lame those lines are to make a down-founded person feel better, those lines are absolutely right.

It's a matter of 5 minute sadness and,  afterwards, a thousand fold solution-making for the future. Though in reality the effect of failure is greater than those good things performed. My flunked reporting last night which lasted for only 45 minutes will still have its drastic effect on my grade, compared to the my utmost endeavors of researching and studying my report for 3 weeks. Technically speaking, it is unfair. We just have to live with that crap. The only subtle reasoning that contradicts such unfairness is the thought that I know in myself that I did my utmost efforts to deliver a well-rounded report.

From the movie 3 Idiots, it stated that the key for solving problems, no matter how terrible, is just to stay calm and say to yourself "All is well". Quite right, because there are so many people having much terrible problem than yours. As long as your heart is calm, there is no need to worry.

For now, my solution would be to study even harder. I have two more chances of redeeming myself in that subject. Most of the higher years and even my classmates believe that luck is always a part of our law school system. But as Harvey Dent in the movie Dark Knight once said, we make our own luck. As for my part, I will not feel like shit anymore and will even study further. My 5 minute sadness is officially over.

Good thing the Chinese Tikoy I fried was a certified calorie overload.